I had an epiphany today. I wanted to create music. I decide to download the FL Studio version 12. FL Studio is a music production software which lets you create good music at par with the professionals. I had ambitious goals of spending the Saturday creating good music. However, fate had other plans.
Naturally, FL Studio is a paid software, and I am broke. So like all of us overachieving broke people, I navigated to one of many torrents’ proxy site. I downloaded a decent 600Mb file which claims to be the cracked version of the directors edition of FL Studio V12 (the latest).
I get excited, download the file and extract it.
There is one notepad file in the folder with the name enjoy.txt. As a pioneer of downloading pirated software over the internet, I know that a .txt file inside a compressed folder generally has instructions of installation with keygen and crack.
However, this particular .txt file only has the following string
This is pretty unusual, but I was really excited to create professional music and become the next Armin Van Buuren! So I double click the setup.exe anyways. The setup file starts like a normal setup and then navigates to a webpage asking my email address. Apparently, I should sign up on several websites to receive the keygen.
I have never felt so stupid in my entire adult life*. Right that moment, I know I am trapped.
Everything is a blur after that moment. My browser goes haywire, opening multiple tabs automatically. Even if I close the browser, it still gets fired up and opens random pages. There is some random processing going on in my processor. My task manager shows that my GPU is also being used for the processing! My computer starts heating up, I disconnect the internet right away.
And Boom! Windows 10 Blue screen error. This is the first time I am seeing one of those on a Windows 10 computer. PFB image for reference.
I hard boot the device and show hidden files and manually start checking folders in the C drive. I find a bunch of malware hidden everywhere. I try deleting a file, but it doesn’t work. I try scanning my PC using Windows Defender and it detects some malware, but before it could resolve it, it starts crunching lots of numbers. Summons the GPU and computer starts heating up again and BOOM! Blue screen error, again!
I hard boot the device again but now it only lands to the Blue screen error, even after multiple attempts. Now my only option is to format my device. Within a matter of minutes I transform from the mindset of a professional electronic music producer to a professional software engineer. FML.
Unfortunately, I don’t have a partition in my hard disk except one stock 15 gb + 800gb partition that came with the machine. Luckily, I have a 32 gb thumb drive which I use to backup extremely critical data**.
The computer then starts its 3 and a half hour long pilgrimage towards enlightenment where it purges all clutter and information and is reborn as a different personality. I lose a lot of other data***.
Even though my computer abstains all the unnecessary data in life, it leaves me hanging while I go through a lot of emotions in this 3 and a half hour period, desperately checking if my computer is back.
This turned out to be the perfect experiment for mindfulness. I consciously decide to delete all images of the past because I don’t need them. Then, whenever I feel restless that all of my data collected over 7 years is gone, just like that. I acknowledge the fact that I am restless and sad and grumpy.
Right when I acknowledge this fact of feeling such a vivid array of emotions, almost magically, I find myself to be calm and at peace with the present. Despite the present being a very emotionally driven event.
If you have read this massive blog post and if you don’t meditate already, I really urge you to do so. Meditation does make a huge difference.
I feel like I have a new world view, both in my WordPress account because of an update and in Life.
I also have a tiny pony and some Carpohydrades in my body from the bottled Badam milk I had at lunch. 🙂
*I downloaded a 1.5gb film @60kbps (12 long grueling hours) which claimed to be Avatar when I was a teenager. I realized I was duped, when the compressed file was asking for a password. It then redirected me to a link asking for my email address to sign up for some random service.
***memories from college stored on the magnetic disk one might call life.